Of Cluedo and Dinner Parties
by Black-Mystique73
Summary: Hermione gave Ron a look that was so Mrs Weasly-ish, he recoiled back ever so slightly. “I hate to have this argument with you every time my parents invite us over to dinner. You’re going Mr Ronald Weasley, whether you like it not” Rated T to be safe


"Nope Hermione, I'm not going"  
"Why on earth not?"  
"Because your parents are as boring as hell"  
"They're not boring Ron it's just that they sometimes lack interesting things to talk about"  
Ron snorted "Oh really, tell me this Hermione, what non-boring person would think that their idea of interesting is discussing teeth"  
"Well, they are both dentist, I mean what do expect?"  
"But Hermione, sweetie, it's every time we see them, I swear last the time I seriously felt like jumping out the bathroom window"  
"Oh, don't be so ridiculous Ron, it wasn't that bad"  
"I'm not being ridiculous, I'm just saying I'd rather face you-know-who again than have dinner with your parents"  
Hermione gave Ron a look that was so Mrs Weasly-ish, he recoiled back ever so slightly.  
"I hate to have this argument with you every time my parents invite us over to dinner. You're going Mr Ronald Weasley, whether you like it not"  
"You want me to die of boredom, don't you?" Ron asked. Hermione rolled her eyes at him.  
"Ron, there's no such thing as dying of boredom" She said  
"Yes there is. My uncle James died from it" Ron said  
"Ron just grow up" Hermione snapped "Like I said before your going and that's final, or else"  
"Or else what?" Ron challenged  
"Or else you'll be sleeping on the couch-" Hermione threatened  
"Fine I'll sleep on the couch then" Ron cut in  
"-and I'll never have sex with you again" Hermione Finished  
Ron stared at his wife incredulously; she had never ever before used what Ron like to call the '_Sex card'_. Apparently Ginny used it on Harry all the time. He and Harry would always discuss this while out on their traditional _boys night out _with him and the twins Fred and George, and according to Harry it always worked. Ron personally found the idea of his younger sister withholding sex from his best friend hilarious, but now as it was happening to himself he didn't find it quite as funny.  
Ron faltered for an answer.  
"Fine! I'll go!" He exasperatedly said  
"Brilliant" Smiled Hermione "They expect us there at 7.00pm"  
"Fine, but if at the end of the evening I'm on the floor dead, then on your head be it"  
"Honestly Ron I don't see while you're moaning" said Hermione rolling her eyes "I never complain when _your_ parents invite us round for dinner"  
"Because Hermione" Answered Ron "My parents, being witches and wizards are million times more interesting and fun than your parents who are just mu-"  
Hermione silenced him with a look.  
"Just because my parents are muggles doesn't mean that they're boring" Said Hermione her anger beginning to flare up "So if you don't mind, Ronald, I would prefer it if you kept you bigoted and negative stereotypical views to yourself!"  
"Sorry 'Mione" Ron said meekly "I didn't mean it"  
"You better have not. Now, pick which shirt you want to wear this evening" She said holding up two shirts "The white one or the blue one?"

Ron looked at both of the shirts with a look of disdain etched on his face.  
"The white one is itchy and the blue one makes me look camp" Ron said displeased, Hermione gave him another stern look.  
"I mean I'll wear the blue one"  
"Good choice" she smiled

It was 6.59pm and Ron and Hermione had just apparated in front the Granger's household with a minute to spare. All afternoon Ron had been suffering, firstly with the knowledge that he had practically lost his Friday evening due to the fact the fact that his bushy-haired, brown eyed wife had managed to persuade, no,_ blackmail _him into having dinner at her parents house and secondly he had had to endure 3 hours of wife trying on and taking off hundreds of dresses, and constantly asking him it whether it made her look fat and whether he thought it matched her shoes.  
Ron honestly didn't care whether the dress his wife wore made her look fat or thin because to him she always looked beautiful and gorgeous in whatever she was wearing. His personal preference was in fact when she wore nothing, but he wasn't going to tell her that then.  
However at this moment, Ron, who, ever since agreeing to have dinner at the Granger's house had been in permanent strop, and had on what Hermione called his "moping" face.  
"Ron stop moping!"  
"I am not moping!"  
"Then why is your face like that"  
"Like what?"  
"Like that!"  
"There's nothing wrong with my face, I always look like this"  
Hermione rolled her eyes and said "Just smile"  
Ron tried to put on a convincing smile, which ended up looking like an extremely painful grimace  
"Err, actually Ron, don't smile"  
Ron frowned at his wife, "Hermione, just ring the bell" he said flatly  
"Not with you looking like that" she replied  
"Like what?!"  
"Like that"  
"What do you mean like that?"  
"You look incredibly annoyed"  
"Oh no Hermione" Ron said sarcastically "I'm perfectly happy spending my Friday evening, talking about fillings and dental floss. What could have possibly given you the idea that I wasn't happy?"  
Hermione ignored his last comment and rung the bell of her parent's house.  
The silhouette of Mrs. Granger's body enlarged as she came closer to the frosted glass door. She opened the door and greeted Ron and Hermione with a large smile.  
"Hermione, Ron, darlings, how have you been? We haven't seen you in ages" Said Mrs. Granger giving her daughter and son-in-law a warm hug each.  
"We've been fine mum" Answered Hermione  
"Yeah we've been fine Mrs Granger, just busy with work and all" answered Ron  
"Now Ron, how many times have I told you not to call me Mrs Granger? Call me Doreen please" said Mrs Granger  
"Ok Doreen" Said Ron in a slightly mocking tone which Mrs Granger didn't appear to notice but Hermione did and she retaliated by shooting Ron with an evil glare.  
"Come in you two, it's absolutely freezing out here, dinner is almost ready, Rob is in the sitting room he can entertain you two with some more of his stories, I know you like those, don't you Ron?"  
"Err, Yeah, I _love_ them, they're so interesting aren't they Hermione?" Ron said sarcastically which again went unnoticed by Mrs Granger but not by Hermione.  
"Yes, Ronald, they are" Said Hermione through gritted teeth.

"Good, you two go ahead into the sitting room relax and do make yourself feel at home, I'll bring in some drinks".

"Ok" Said Hermione  
She and Ron then made their way into the sitting room, where they were greeted by a tired looking but cheerful Mr Granger.  
"Ron" He said sitting down in his favorite armchair next to the fireplace "Did I ever tell you the story of when I had to replace this poor fellows filling only for his tooth to fall out two days later"?  
"I don't believe you have Mr Granger" Ron sighed trying to sound interested but knowing what was about to come next.

"Well, Ron, I must say it is a gripping story, this chap" Mr Granger began "his name was Jeremy, a jolly nice chap he was, had the cleanest, strongest teeth…"

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It had been two hours, two precious hours of Ron's life he would never get back. They were all sat in the dining room, round the dinner table, eating the some-what delicious dinner Mrs. Granger had prepared of roast beef and Yorkshire pudding.  
"...and I told him" Mr Granger continued "If he wanted me to check his teeth he would have to brush them on a regular basis. The last time that man opened his mouth, I nearly passed out from the smell; honestly, you'd think that man had never heard of a toothbrush"  
_Never again, never bloody again_ Ron thought repeatedly to himself.  
You see for the past two hours poor Ron had been stuck listening to these endless dental tales from his dear mother and father-in-law.  
"May I please be excused, I need to use the bathroom" Ron asked politely "And jump out the window" he muttered in an undertone, so only Hermione could hear him.  
She rolled her eyes at him, but said nothing.  
"Of course you can Ron darling, remember third door on the left" Said Mrs Granger  
"Thank you" Ron replied and hastily made his way out the room, knowing at least if he could get a quick five minute break from these two people it would slightly help him resist the urge to stick a fork in his arm, just to check if he was still alive.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Hermione Jean Granger, if you ever make me have to go through anything like that again, I think I may kill myself" Ron said as soon as they arrived home after dinner.  
"Ron, calm down it wasn't that bad" Hermione reasoned  
"Wasn't that bad!? _I have never seen teeth as white as those, they were immaculate_" Ron said mimicking Mr Granger "Hermione, were you in the same room as I was? That was torture; you so owe me for that"  
"Oh? I owe you?"  
"Yeah you do actually and I think I know what you can do to repay me" Said Ron smiling suggestively, slipping his toned, freckled arms around his wife  
"Oh really" Hermione Smiled  
"Yes really" Whispered Ron into her ear  
"Isn't it quite late?"  
"It's never late to do this" He grinned  
"Can it not wait until tomorrow? I'm extremely tired" Hermione Yawned

"No, it can't" said Ron letting go of his wife and looking at her, with the most adorable puppy dog expression her could muster.  
"Fine, we'll do it, but only a quick one. I just don't see why you like it so much" Hermione  
"Because Hermione" Ron explained "The murderer, weapon and the scene of the crime are always different from the last one, which always makes it fun to play each time round" .He bent over to retrieve the 'Cluedo' box from under the sofa and held it up. "This is extremely fun for a muggle game. Who do you want to be?"  
"Miss Scarlett, I suppose" Hermione sighed, settling down on the floor  
"Great, I'm Reverend Green, Let me set everything up" Ron said grinning goofily, almost childlike.  
_Why on earth did I ever buy this game?_ Hermione thought to herself miserably, she knew from the over excited look in Ron's eyes that it was going to be an extremely long night.

It would really help me if you did leave reviews, so then I can know how I'm doing and if there's anything I can do to improve.


End file.
